Four months ago my wife gave birth to our first child – Everest Grey Jafarian. Since then, my world has forever changed.
Let’s start with Birth.
If you haven’t experienced it yet, I can assure you it’s one of the most intense things a human being can experience. It’s also one of the most beautiful things a human being can experience. I enjoyed [almost] every moment of it, and it’s certainly an experience I’ll never forget. Instead of digging into the nitty-gritty details I’ll just say that it’s something you should experience.
Who’s getting up?
I can’t tell you how nervous I was driving Everest home from the hospital. It felt like I was carrying the world’s most precious cargo on a top secret mission. You know those bank trucks? It was like that times 10. Laser focused on the road with one goal in mind – get that baby home!
To be honest, the first month was mostly crying and pooping. Sure, there were some fun moments here and there as new parents, but it was A LOT more of the sleepless nights that you hear about before pregnancy.
The First Smile
Right around 6 weeks is when we got our first smile. I think the first one came while my wife was changing him. I was downstairs and heard a sudden cry! Before I could make it to the stairs she was laughing and talking to him in that baby voice that we all adopt as new parents. By the time I got up to our room Everest was done smiling… but I’d get my first a day later on the changing table. To this day there’s something about that changing table that just makes that boy happy!
Now I want to make sure I don’t undersell this smile. Getting that first smile was like getting injected with a love tranquilizer. Suddenly all the crying and dirty diapers over the last 6 weeks had been forgotten! My son just smiled!!! 🙂
From then on Gabrielle and I would fight over who could change him because we knew there was a 90% chance for smile.
Chubby Cheeks, at Last…
Everest was a little underweight at birth, which was a problem because he was a Persian baby. Why is that a problem? Because Persians LOVE to pinch, squeeze, kiss, and just about eat chubby cheeks. I’m not joking… if the baby isn’t chubby most Persians start thinking something’s wrong… like it needs to start eating more or something!
We finally got our chubby cheeks in month 3, and boy were we ready. Those smiles got even cuter with a nice round face and some soft, chubby cheeks to kiss.
I’d Like some Attention, Please!
By 16 weeks Everest had become smart enough to really recognize his parents, which was awesome! However, this ALSO meant he knew when his parents weren’t around. So any time you left the room for more than a minute he’d unleash the “whine cry.” And on rare occasion, he’d sneak in a “pouty lip” that was impossible to ignore.
On top of that, he learned how to scream!
One day we were hanging at home doing regular family things and all of a sudden we heard a high pitch scream out of our son. Gabrielle and I both looked at each other in amazement like, “Did he just do that?” Then he did it again! And again! Out of nowhere our son had developed this scream and he loved it! He’d scream in the mornings, in the evenings, even right before bed. Sometimes he’d string 3 or 4 screams in a row, which was hilarious.
Month 5 is titled “Gimme That” because this is when Everest learned to grab things. Not only did he start grabbing things… the things he grabbed usually proceeded right into his mouth! Toys, blankets, clothes, my fingers, you name it. If he could grab it he could taste it. This seems like it’ll make a lot more sense once he starts eating solid foods.
With the grabbing came shaking as well. We have quite a few “rattler” toys that he loves to shake like a salt shaker.
Grab. Eat. Shake. Repeat.
What I’ve learned so far…
Raising a child is HARD. It’s an uncomfortable, foreign experience that tests your limits. You actually understand why people shake babies after having one of your own (not to say that it’s right). You start to appreciate your parents even more, knowing what they went through with you years ago.
You learn how to become really efficient with your time. You cherish every minute of extra sleep. You go to bed at 8:30pm, sharp. You skip meals regularly. You pick up a new language (high pitch Babynese). You become really fast at changing diapers. You laugh when friends ask you to go out. You create a new song for just about everything. You learn to love something like you’ve never loved before.
These have been the longest, most stressful, exciting, sleep-deprived, truly amazing months of my life. I wouldn’t trade them for anything, and I can’t wait for what’s to come.
Ali is a father, husband and serial entrepreneur with a deep drive to create. He writes, records, codes and builds things to inspire the artist in all of us.
2 thoughts on “On Becoming a Father”
From my point of view your wife and you are doing an excellent job with Everest.I cannot wait to meet him.Thanks for sharing your experiences with all of us on Facebook.What I have learned most being a Father is staying connected to your children.Find an activity you both can be involved in and take part in once they are old enough to do so . For my youngest and I it was martial arts and dirtbikes.With the others it was alitttle different.Even at a young age constantly spend time with them and make them laugh and smile alot.Plenty of hugs and kisses go along way.
Great stuff, Hank! 🙂